Today is the day I have dreaded for 365 days....Hopey's heart appointment is at 1:30pm. At last year's appointment, we learned her aortic valve is leaking more. In addition to the aneurysm in her heart, the cardiologist will be paying particularly close attention to that.
As I have anticipated this day, I have marveled at how perfect my baby girl's heart is in spite of the physical brokeness.
At almost eight years of age, my Hopey is learning to fit into the "typical" world. For instance, I watch as she makes her best attempts to use a fork and spoon in the restaurant instead of her fingers so the stares will stop. She'll reach out her chubby little pinchers to easily pick up a carrot from her plate at the Cracker Barrel....but then she'll peer over the top of her glasses to see if the person who was staring earlier is still looking at her. If not, that carrot goes "plop" into her mouth....followed quickly by another....and another. But if she sees the stare, she'll work for however long it takes to manage that fork...she'll even hand that fork to Chappy and me and have us place a carrot on it for her.....so the staring will stop.
AND in the grocery store, even though those lights, aisles, shopping carts, different smells and colors bring out the worst in Hope's battle with sensory issues, she now buries her head in her hands and hides so she won't scream out and disturb "the typicals" and their shopping efforts. Yep, those stares have conditioned my little girl.
These are only two examples. There are many more. Hopey cannot express her needs with words, her muscle tone makes simple tasks like opening a door impossible, and after three open heart surgeries, her ticker is still a complete mess....but she is concerned about pleasing everyone else. She always has a hug or a smile ready to give to whoever needs it! She is the most selfless person I know.
Father, I pray for a good report for my little angel today. Thank you for giving me the gift of "Hope".
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