Wednesday, August 18, 2010




"Something is wrong with that little boy....he is one year old and still can't sit up. His parents are in denial or something, but there is obviously a problem and the baby needs some help."

Words.


Do you hear them?



Really? How about the word: DENIAL???


I could be re-named "Denial". The word encompasses my being every single day. Each morning before pre-school, Hopey begins her day splashing in a warm bath with bright smiles. Daddy, who has been at the gym, enters the house just as she is leaving. She watches for him with eagerness, because she knows what he is going to say. He says it every day: "Where's my beautiful girl?" before planting kisses all over her sweet face. I drop her off at school for four hours only anticipating the hour when I get to return to her hugs at pick up. At dinner, she proudly sits in her own chair and eats heartily like a big girl, sometimes having daddy zoom her fork around the table with a loud "vrrooom" until it plants itself in her wide open mouth. The game excites her so much, she literally flaps her arms like a big old chicken.

Play time. Hugs. Laughter. Games. The most dreamy green eyes you have ever seen. Our Hope.

Hope has a chronic heart condition. Hope has an aneurysm in her heart that is growing. Hope's life will be shortened because of her heart.

I hear those words. I speak those words. But they are only words to me; words from a doctor. Those words are not anywhere near my soul. Each moment, I only long for more moments.

Denial.

When I learned of the little fella who is one year old and still not sitting up, I didn't fret or worry. Are his mom and dad in denial? Probably. His momma is completely missing the disability, because momma's eyes only see their precious baby. I am convinced God wipes away every ounce of sensibility from a gal when she becomes a mom---from that point on, her little brood is perfect. Flaws? She can't see them. Mistakes? She's ready to forgive them. Grudges? Never. Hope? Always.

If you are a momma who is living in denial today.....I get you. And while I don't have the answers, I do know the ONE who does. He doesn't promise to fix things, but He does promise to be so very close, He is the shade on our right hand. In fact, stop for a moment and be still. Can you feel Him? He has His arms around us right now. And better yet, He gets us too.

Psalm 121:5 "The LORD Himself watches over you! The LORD stands beside you as your protective shade."

6 comments:

  1. I want to be a mom in denial. I know ones who aren't...and I don't want to be that mom.

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  2. and just look at sweet Hopey in her POPPY DIP!! OOH love it......
    love your honesty !!

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  3. Wow! Thanks so much for this post. I really needed it.
    My little boy has Aspergers Syndrome. I worry about him 24/7/365. Anyway, he enters the fourth grade tomorrow and I have stressed myself sick over it. But, I did pause and feel God's arms around me. Thanks so much for helping me today!

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  4. I'm pretty sure you wrote this for me, so thank you. :)

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