Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Baby Hope Doesn't Have A Voice, But We Do!

I awoke this morning around 3am with little arms reached up to me.....accompanied by a sweet smile.....bed-head hair.....and big, sleep dusted green eyes. Four years old, but the size of a two year old who is way too small to climb up into a bed all by herself, I have no idea how long she stood beside my bed with her arms outstretched. But when I pulled her up into the bed, her feet and hands were as cold as four chunks of ice. Hope quickly cuddled up close and was soon sound asleep.

Hopey still isn't speaking, so she didn't make a single sound while she stood beside my side of the bed early this morning. Patiently, little miss stood very quiet until I noticed her presence. Thank goodness I awoke and spotted her. Because Hope doesn't communicate with words, I have no idea what caused her to awake and search me out.....was it a bad dream or a tummy ache? I'll never know.

Living with a four year old who wants to communicate but lacks the ability to let others in on her desires is a challenge. My heart breaks for Hope; I long to hear her voice. Although she is able to do some sign language, she isn't able to communicate her thoughts, feelings, and fears with signs.

As I prepare for the New Year, I am reminded of all I have to be grateful for.....more than I could possibly list. Today, given Hope's middle-of-the-night visit, I am reminded that communication is an incredible gift. I am thankful for the 400- 500 people who join me daily by reading my thoughts, struggles, and journey to the Father through this blog......I hope, together, we will draw even nearer to our Creator in 2010, challenging one another to go deeper than ever before.

In closing, be reminded we need to use the voices we have been given to speak boldly about our True Love, sharing His story with the world. May we give everything we have to give to the One who gave everything for us! Hug your family tight---another year is behind us. Another year closer to the return of our Lord!

"For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth your words you will be justified, and by your words, you will be condemned." Matthew 12: 34-37


  1. I came across your blog through the fund-raising effort and I've become an avid follower. I love your posts challenging us Christians to do more... so much more! I have always felt a tug on my heart for adoption and it's something that I feel so strongly about. Also, I am a pediatric speech pathologist. I have one adorable little girl with DS on my caseload and also one precious little girl who was adopted from China..I've referred both of these parents to your blog!
    I wish the best for your precious Hope and I know that she will very soon find a way to find her voice!!

  2. Mel, what a gift you have as a mother. I believe you awoke just as Hope came to your beside and your "mother sense" woke you. You know we love and pray for you all.

  3. Melanie, thank you for your voice. It has been a blessing to get to know you this year!!

    Happy New Year,

  4. By my words and the absence of words I will certainly only be condemned... I have not spoken loudly enough for the ones with no voice. It's a great challenge.

    I want to tell you that I was telling a friend of mine that I just know God is telling me that we are done. That I am supposed to focus on Liam and not on the "next thing" or on another adoption. I told her that I know that doesn't bare out Scripturally, for me to say God isn't asking me to adopt again, but that every issue we deal with with Liam, I feel Him whisper to me that He has other things for me and you know what she said? "Are you sure it's God whispering those things and not Satan?" Ugh! You and she are going to force me back onto this train, aren't you! :)

  5. I feel the same way with Micah... sure would love to be able to hear what's in his heart and on his mind. For now facial expression keeps us guessing! :)

    Love you friend... Happy New Year!